I Never Deserve the Things I Need Acoustic EP

by On My Honor

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released 08 October 2013

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Track Name: Rafters Acoustic
Sometimes I think I died in the rafters that night
Shocked to death, barely 25
Limp limbs, heart electrified
One burnt arm, an open casket for these friends of mine

Make me ashes in your back yard
Portions on the mantle

What if I get to Heaven
To a sign that reads, “No, your kind’s not welcome”
Neither were your questions
Good try, but you’ve heard how we feel here about intentions

Please get rid of the mess
For the sake of my parents
We know they’ll blame themselves
They shouldn’t have to see this
Remains of efforts
The best intentions of their only son

Take my things, place them on shelves
As small reminders for everyone else
He stood so tall, but then he fell
Boxes full of ideas that I once held

Make me ashes in your back yard
Portions on the mantle
I tried
When I’m gone will you carry out my intentions

What if I get to Heaven
To a sign that reads, “No, your kind’s not welcome”
Neither were your questions
Good try, but you’ve heard how we feel here about intentions
Track Name: I Never Deserve the Things I Need Acoustic
I want to live by the ocean
At least near water of some kind
To keep me cool in the warmer months
When winter hits, providing something solid in my life
I’m not breaking any ice
Thin limbs are reaching out too far
They wont be getting any better
A bitter man’s mind
Equipped with
Childlike arms

These branches are retracting
Curling in on me
Holding on as long as possible to every leaf
Pleading with the earth and sun
Until I fall, they’ll all stay safe
In my shade’s reach

But they’re blowing away
The colorful parts of me
The purpose I serve
Piece by piece
Falling off of me

A cleansing, by fire
Burnt down in private
No one can ever see
I never, I never deserve the things I need

I sought the role of an open book
Lent too many times
Thrown in bags, floorboards of cars
Critiqued by too many minds
Highlighted and dog-eared
To no convenience of mine

A cleansing, by fire
Burnt down in private
No one can ever see
I never, I never deserve the things I need

As much as it pains me
I need you to knowYou’re what I carry with me
Every time I go
Despite every nightmare
Clawing at my soul
I count it a privelege
Just to watch you grow

No rest for the strong
If that’s how you’re percieved
Too close, too close
You’re too close to me
It’s what I craved and cried for
I never deserve the things I need
I want to live by the ocean
At least near water of some kind
Track Name: Gypsy Summer Acoustic
Spent a solid night
Dodging sleep again
A dirty garage littered with
Smoke from pipes and pyramids of cans
Scale one more roof
For talks of friends estranged
The heights that offer views
Of times that earn our praise

At times you have to dive
Through sewage in this life
That filthy creek where
The purest parts reside
At times you have to dive
By filth you’ll be baptized
Oh, holy night
Dive until the sunrise

Eyes fixed on grey skies
While we try to find our feet
A downhill run in morning air
Though we always swim upstream
Asleep in the basement
With dogs that live like me
In the cold of the sounds we make
In the warmth of loyalty

At times you have to dive
Through sewage in this life
That filthy creek where
The purest parts reside
At times you have to dive
By filth you’ll be baptized
Oh, holy night
Dive until the sunrise

A summer for gypsies
Reviving books I try to read
When my hands stop shaking
In times when the daylight finally favors me

A summer for gypsies
Where I find my separate peace
We left our clothes there
In exchange for the things that we keep

At times you have to dive
Through sewage in this life
That filthy creek where
The purest parts reside
At times you have to dive
By filth you’ll be baptized
Oh, holy night
Dive until the sunrise
Track Name: Indrid Cold Acoustic
In case I wasn't clear
I'm not mad at anyone
I'm just trying to let
Bygones by bygones

But it's getting harder
When I feel so unwelcome
In something that I helped build

I don't deserve the looks I'm getting
Our motives aren't the same
And you'll never gain admittance into anything
Anything that bears my name
So keep your arms crossed
Fall in line with the jealous sort
Rather practice what we preach
Than gain your false support

In case I wasn't clear
I'm not mad at anyone
I'm just trying to let
Bygones by bygones
In case I wasn't clear
I'm not mad at anyone
I'm just trying to let
Bygones by bygones

Feels I've framed all of the blue prints
Thought for days about inclusion
Holding on to old ideals
I'd rather idolize than lose them

So you can stay elite
Broadcasting whatever you think
I laid my groundwork
When I was fifteen

In the form of hearing loss
Arms raised high
Sweat rolling off
They can paint away
But the songs we sang
Are stuck in these walls

So you can stay elite
Broadcasting whatever you think
I laid my groundwork
When I was fifteen

In case I wasn't clear
I'm not mad at anyone
I'm just trying to let
Bygones by bygones

In case I wasn't clear
I'm not mad at anyone
I'm just trying to let
Bygones by bygones
Forgive and forget

What I tell myself and my friends
Combatting attitudes too cool
While we stay temperate

Forgive and forget
What I tell myself and my friends
Combatting attitudes too cool
While we stay temperate

Forgive and forget
What I tell myself and my friends
Combatting attitudes too cool
While we stay temperate